Are You Blaming Your Parents for Your Problems?
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Have you noticed how easy it is for you to accuse someone of their wrongdoing than to appreciate them for the things they did right?Research shows that the human brain is wired to react more emotionally to the bad things people do. That is why you tend to assign blame much faster than you give compliments.
Blame and praise are processed by different mechanisms in different parts of the brain.
Change begins with knowing. Admitting that you have an issue with putting your incompetencies in the doorstep of others and the willingness to turn away from it in order to lead a better life.
- They are humans first before they are your parent. Humans are not supernatural (or are you?). They had a life before they had you and they go through phases like you do. As you recognize this, it gives you a different sense of approaching your challenge.
|Photo Credit: Pexel|
- Ask them questions. This might be tough especially if you suffered abuse from them. When you ask them questions and try to understand them, you realize some truth you never knew about them and how their past has affected their present. Truth is, if you don’t question them, you may never understand what prompted their decisions and you are likely to make those same mistakes they made (blood is thick and many traits are transferable).
- Forgive them. Forgiveness births healing. If you want to rise above your bitter state of mind, regardless of what your parents did you, forgiveness is one critical step towards achieving this. There’s no point trying to make them feel guilty for what they did because if that’s only what you do, guys, you might just end up like them you know.
Live Responsibly. Responsibility is the rule of the game. Blaming people for your shortcomings only amplifies how entitled you are and that will do you no good.
Your parents may not have provided you with everything that you wanted while growing up but be sure they gave you all the had because ‘you can’t give away what you don’t have‘– says Wayne Dyner.More than anything else, understand that nobody owes you anything, not even your parents. And for every privilege you enjoy, you should develop a deep sense of gratitude and be appreciative of them.The Word of Life teaches us to honor our father and mother so that we may live well enjoy length of days on the earth.